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20110701
20110731
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12, 2011. from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show with jon stewart." captioning sponsored by comedy central [theme song playing] [cheering and applause] >> jon: welcome to "the daily show." my name is jon stewart. the great kid rock will be joining us on the program tonight, and i'm going to go with shark. all right. [cheering and applause] folks, i'm going to start with a problem. we got a problem. apparently america spends more than it takes in. so america needs to figure out a way to become more fiscally responsible. unfortunately while america figures it out, there is a repo man, let's call him "china," that on august 2nd could possibly repossess us. [laughter] the good news is we have a couple of good debt reduction options at our disposal. worse comes to worse, we could for some weird reason arbitrarily change the money we're allowed to be in date, which makes no [bleeped] sense whatsoever, but the bad news is the people in charge of putting together this country-saving plans are the same ones who as of today are currently on the floor
stewart captioning sponsored by comedy central (cheers and applause) >> jon: welcome to the daily show with jon stewart. we have a very good show tonight. our guest tonight, neil patrick her is. (cheers and applause) now as you know many of our viewers live in the northern hemisphere. (laughter) i dot longitudes and latitudes but i really don't-- (laughter) an experienced-- (laughter) a lot of map lovers in the audience. anyway, in the hemisphere has experienced in the past week a weather phenomenon of extreme heat called labs, falaro where the sun gets close enough to the earth to hug it. and then do this to it it but where we humans saw hardship, tv weather news people saw hot-pertunity. >> we just took this justy t bone out of the fri see if we can cook it on the dashboard of a car. >> you can really cook eggs on a street, bake cookies on a dashboard. >> the mac and cheese have cooked. >> i will taste the pizza. >> the pizza is actually fully cooked. it is not global warning, it is god preheating america. (laughter) by the way, this guy may be eat pizza straight off the sidewalk, bu
resort to these incredibly gimmicky stunts when discussing extreme weather conditions? >> jon, it's about taking complicated scientific phenomenon and making it accessible. 103 he agrees with 70% humidity, a, but everybody understands does it hotten food? (laughter) >> jon: so the gimmick, the pizza, the standing outside in the hurricane s just a way for us nonscientists to understand extreme weather? >> well, really any weather. for instance the heat wave broke today but it's still over 80 degrees fahrenheit or to put ina that in terms rubes like you might understand, egg salad sandwich warming weather. (laughter) this has been outside all day, with this glass of milk. >> jon: i don't think-- no i don't think you should eat that. >> oh, yeah, oh-- oh, oh, man, that is such flavor. oh. i should wash it down with this lumpy milk. >> jon: i don't -- >> oh, oh-- . >> jon: i don't think you should be eating -- >> you should call me one of those vans with the lights on the front of it you know what, i'll call it. wehoo within wehhoo. >> stephen: . >> jon: i told you not to eat that i'm not sur
be reached or is this atmosphere just poison. >> jon: captain america! (cheers and applause) >> jon: let me get you caught up. while many americans were enjoying america's fast food sidewalks and justy dashboard steaks our country moved close ever to self-inflicted economic coulds la, something we have known has been companying for as long as we have been told, it's coming. >> treasury secretary tim geithner sut approximatinging a date on what says would be a national disaster, as early as parch 31st. >> we can give congress until the end of june. >> geithner says the nation will disolve on its dead july 8th. >> moved the drop dead date from july 8th to august 2 wnd if congress doesn't act by the second they will put our-- they will downgrade our credit, first time in history, and if that happens, are you going to see cat strafk damage across the american economy and across the global economy. >> jon: the only other catastrophe that's moved its date this often was spicerman turn off the darbling. (laughter) (laughter) 112th congress has been completely unable to muster a debt sealing agreem
news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with jon stewart. (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to "the daily show"! my name is jon stewart. good show tonight! we got a nice one for you tonight. our guest tonight, npr's juan williams will be joining us. (cheers and applause) really? he's not there anymore? (laughter) well, i'll definitely ask him about that. (laughter) but we begin, of course, with our ongoing national crisis. (laughter and applause) one week, ladies and gentlemen, for our two parties to agree to raise the country's arbitrary debt limit for the 102nd time for the drop-dead august 2 catastrophic ultimatum we've already moved twice. (laughter) and so it was under these conditions that president barack obama interrupted a bachelorette's search for love... (laughter). ... to take that long walk down "we killed bin laden" lane. >> tonight i want to talk about the debate we've been having in washington over the national debt. >> jon: the debate we've been having? (laughter) is that what that noise out of washingt
Search Results 0 to 14 of about 15 (some duplicates have been removed)

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